astudyiniero:

girls don’t want boyfriends girls want a seven book series about the marauders’ life at hogwarts

First day of kindergarten you cried ‘cause you broke the yellow crayon and you were too afraid to tell anyone. You’ve come pretty far. Ending the world, not a terrific notion, but the thing is yeah, I love you. I loved crayon-breaky Willow and I love scary veiny Willow. So if I’m goin’ out, it’s here. You wanna kill the world? You start with me. I’ve earned that.

I never wanted any of this. I never wanted to be in the games. I just wanted to save my sister and keep Peeta alive. Miss Everdeen, it’s the things we love most that destroy us.

billiondollarbaby:

I can’t wait for winter because that’s when all mosquitoes die and go to hell where they belong


"Mad was the last kid I saw and he was asleep. He was 3 months old and they put him in my arms and he stayed asleep and they put him in the bath and he stayed asleep and I thought he was narcoleptic or something. Then he opened his eyes and just stared at me for the longest time and I just stared at him and I started crying and he smiled. And it wasn’t that he smiled that he liked me, it was just that I hadn’t held children in my life and I was always considered so dark and I always had so many things that made me feel like maybe I shouldn’t be somebody’s mom because certainly the world has an opinion of me and I’m not so sure about myself and am I gonna be the best mom? So the fact that this little kid seemed at ease gave me the courage to feel like I could make him happy. And so we became a family right then." — Angelina Jolie

"Mad was the last kid I saw and he was asleep. He was 3 months old and they put him in my arms and he stayed asleep and they put him in the bath and he stayed asleep and I thought he was narcoleptic or something. Then he opened his eyes and just stared at me for the longest time and I just stared at him and I started crying and he smiled. And it wasn’t that he smiled that he liked me, it was just that I hadn’t held children in my life and I was always considered so dark and I always had so many things that made me feel like maybe I shouldn’t be somebody’s mom because certainly the world has an opinion of me and I’m not so sure about myself and am I gonna be the best mom? So the fact that this little kid seemed at ease gave me the courage to feel like I could make him happy. And so we became a family right then." — Angelina Jolie

we-arethewildthings:

Thank you so much, John Oliver.

destiny919:

umiko-hitara:

obsidianshadow:

sangotori:

A moment of silence as The Giver joins Percy Jackson in the graveyard of horrendously inaccurate movie adaptations

*His Dark Materials fandom wails softly in the distance*

*Eragon fandom shrieks from the darkest pit of hell*

*ATLA fandom watches with dead eyes*

One slip and I am dead.

I read several dozen stories a year from miserable, lonely guys who insist that women won’t come near them despite the fact that they are just the nicest guys in the world.

..I’m asking what do you offer? Are you smart? Funny? Interesting? Talented? Ambitious? Creative? OK, now what do you do to demonstrate those attributes to the world? Don’t say that you’re a nice guy — that’s the bare minimum.

“Well, I’m not sexist or racist or greedy or shallow or abusive! Not like those other douchebags!”

I’m sorry, I know that this is hard to hear, but if all you can do is list a bunch of faults you don’t have, then back the fuck away…

Don’t complain about how girls fall for jerks; they fall for those jerks because those jerks have other things they can offer. “But I’m a great listener!” Are you? Because you’re willing to sit quietly in exchange for the chance to be in the proximity of a pretty girl (and spend every second imagining how soft her skin must be)? Well guess what, there’s another guy in her life who also knows how to do that, and he can play the guitar. Saying that you’re a nice guy is like a restaurant whose only selling point is that the food doesn’t make you sick. You’re like a new movie whose title is This Movie Is in English, and its tagline is “The actors are clearly visible”.

They´re are heading away from each other. No it´s ok, that´s how it happened the first time. It took my parents a while to accept their feelings. Must run in the family.